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Hankbrown

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<caption><font face="georgia"; font-size="9px"><center> Add <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/friends/add.bml?user=hankbrown">me</a><br> email <a href="mailto:farrisroy1234@msn.com"> me.</a><br><br> </caption>
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Art [18 Jul 2003|02:14pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]

boo!


Click this one!!
(click for full image)
</center>

Art by Johnjohnjesse.com.
My girl made a bunch of icons using this guys art..check them out at dreamyicons
I'm going to bed.

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[05 Jul 2003|04:47pm]
Its early morning and I have'nt went to bed. My girls in the shower and the movies over (Gangs Of New York). So I thought I would type a couple lines. Then go to bed!
The 4th at my brothers was great my girls kids had a good time. I'm glad. My brother over did it on fireworks. He really likes fire. We eat BBQ then just kick it tell it got dark. It was nice having Barbara and her kids with me. My family really likes them.
I'm really starting to enjoy the kids being around makes me think why have'nt I had any. Like times running out. Hopeful in the next couple of years I'll have a child.
Next week I'm going to start looking for a new job. I need something different less stress full and more fulfilling. I went back to part time so I can have more time to look. Its like I;m stuck. I'm doing very bad at my job too. I really don't like going. I have been there 2 years and I'm not being fair to me or them. So its time for something else. After I find something different something I can do for a while and pay my bills. Then I think I'll start looking for a career and go to school for it. Right now I have no idea what thats going to be.
Well I'm going to watch my girl play her pps2 game and go to sleep doing it.
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morning [03 Jul 2003|07:45pm]
Just woke up. Its about 8 and my girlfriend stayed up all night playing ps2 & making icons. Now she is asleep on the floor with a ps2 controller in her hand.(very cute) Its bad ass to me when a chick is so good at ps2 and stuff like that. I don't know many. She is really good to! (so cool) Its the forth today lots of food and fireworks tonight. I'm going to try getting her in bed and going back to sleep for a bit.
7 Spoke up   post comment

[03 Jul 2003|06:57am]
I'm just sitting here so I thought I would write down my thoughts for today. I'm new at this and I had already typed up this post. Then I hit some button and BAM it was gone. I called my tech support (my girlfriend) but what ever I did she could not find my post. So lets see if I can do this again.
Tomorrow is the 4th and I'm taking my new girlfriend and her two kids to my brothers for a BBQ. My moms going to be there it should be lots of fun. My girlfriends met my family only once but she made a good first impression because they keep asking me to bring her around. I'm glad, she's a beautiful person. (inside & out)
This morning when I woke up I found myself laying in bed watching her sleep. I was thinking to myself that I love this girl! Later when she got up she looked great like she was glowing and I thought how lucky I am.
Its weird how things happen. I'm kinda nerves because I did just leave a unhealthy relationship. I just hope I don't fuck it up you know do something dumb because i have some trust issues. I don't think so hopefully. She has been great about all of it. Its not like we just meet I have known her for a long time. She knowns my whole sordid mess. Man I can't say enough how special she is. She just walk by she is beautiful!
I'm going to post this now. Then we are going to watch Gangs Of New York. Then maybe i'll unload some more of my thoughts on my journal. I think I'm getting hook.
4 Spoke up   post comment

life [02 Jul 2003|11:00am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I have been thinking how my life has changed recently for me I left a 9 year relationship and it was real emotional for me.. she cheated on me and she was my best friend but people change we had been through a lot together and things had just started evening out in the past year I thought but we seemed not to see the unhealthy relationship we called our life.
It was like us against the world and it pulled us together then things got better and it was different and I guess she thought there was something out there I could not give her and now looking back its true. I could not give her all she needed and its hard to write that for a man but looking back, I was not getting what I needed ether its strange to think how you can be with someone and love them then one day realize that some how the fire and the love was gone and you knew it was gone forever.
Your lives are so intertwined that you're scared to death to be with out them but she gave us the out when she cheated, it was one of the hardest things I had to deal with.
It can give you a complex let me tell you. I felt real alone but its like things happen for a reason because I really wasn't happy and we really did have a bad relationship for the past 4 years but we still needed the safety of each other for a little longer ..........
What's that saying? There's a silver lining in every rain cloud. I do believe that everything happens for a reason so anyway if your still reading.. I realize today that there's more out there for me then an unhealthy relationship with a girl I don't know anymore.. It took a friend of mine that knew us for a long time someone I always felt a connection to help me see that and now that friend is my girlfriend.
It's weird how you can forget what its like to fall in love with someone. Well, I think this is long enough but man its real rewarding to just write it down before I post this I would like to thank my girlfriend ibdreamy (Barbara) for everything hopefully she knows I love her even when she's yelling at me for not using proper punctuation and run on sentences (sorry)

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